When Chronic Illness Steals Your Memories

From a young age many of us are aware that we will grow old, get sick, and possibly even lose our minds.

Or at least we are aware our memories will not last forever.

We have a lot of time though, right? That only happens after someone has lived a long full life. Right?

Things do not always happen in that order.

Losing your memory at a young age is a horribly scary thing to go through.

To be in your 20s and to go from having perfect recall, to not remembering a conversation that happened a few hours ago, is alarming.

To be a person that loves to learn, and to realize your retention of information is rapidly diminishing, is terrifying.

To take a handful of pills everyday for your various ailments, but to not always remember what they are all for, is concerning.

To have been an avid reader from the age of five, but to suddenly not remember most of the books you have read, much less their plots, is saddening.

To live your life heavily relying on lists, reminders, and alarms, is exasperating.

To know that if you lost your electronic device that tells what to do and when to do it you, yourself would be lost, is frightening.

To repeatedly have your loved ones tell you “we already talked about this”, is agonizing.

The world around us constantly reminds us that this is not the way things are supposed to go.

When you tell someone you have a bad memory and they respond “you're too young for that”, it sends shock waves through your body.

When you can't remember something and someone responds “but you normally have such a good memory!” it is like being punched in the gut.

We don't need reminders. We already know this is not normal. We already know this is a different reality than the one we had just a few years ago.

To be in what should be the prime of your life, but to genuinely fear that all of your memories will soon be gone, is heart wrenching.

When an illness takes your memories it is like it is stealing you, it is stealing your life.

#ChronicIllness #Fibromyalgia #MentalHealth